When I chose Jesus, I didn’t know what was coming down the pipeline. I didn’t know my heart would be broken by loss and betrayal. Do I regret choosing Jesus? Absolutely not! I thank God that he didn’t give up on me. I thank Him for calling me out of the darkness.
Months after losing my son, I joined a grief support group. I was hurting, angry, and slowly falling apart. At that first meeting, the host asked if we could ever forgive the person responsible for our loss. Everyone that answered stated that they would never forgive, and then it was my turn. Everything in me wanted to scream NO! NEVER! And I replied, “I have to forgive him”
For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your father will not forgive your sins.Matthew 6:14-15
Everyone looked at me as if I were crazy, but I went on to express, it is a requirement. I must forgive if I want God to forgive me. Did I feel like I wanted to forgive? No, but again it is a requirement for those in Christ.
My son is now gone. And as much as I miss and love him, I will not gamble with my salvation by holding on to unforgiveness. I believe when we hold on to unforgiveness, it opens the door for roots of bitterness, anger, vengeance, and wrath to grow in us. How would being bitter help me?
Bitterness grows, branches out, and spreads like cancer in you, and before you know it, you don’t recognize yourself. Now, nobody wants to be around you exept those who are miserable and bitter themselves. Now we have a case of the blind leading the blind.
It occurred to me that sometimes we hold on to our pain and hurt because we feel like we shouldn’t be happy without that something or someone. Well, that is a lie from the enemy! The enemy wants you to be bitter, resentful, angry, and unforgiving because it profits him. He wants your soul, as many as he can get before his time is up.
If you woke up this morning, you still have a purpose. Everything God does or allows to happen to you or in your life has purpose. I knew God was preparing me for something, but I didn’t know what. When I say your healing is everything, I mean just that. He wants to heal us so that he can use us according to the purpose He put us here to accomplish. Healing doesn’t mean forgetting what or who we lost. It means giving up control, recognizing it’s not about us and trusting our Father to take care of us. He wants to heal you, give you peace and rest so that you can be a be a walking, talking testimony of his power. There is someone out there who you are assigned to reach. Don’t allow bitterness, anger, vengeance, and wrath to steal you away from your God-given purpose.
God is in the restoration business. I’m not talking about material things even though he can and will do it. I am talking about restoring us from broken to whole if we just Lay it at the feet of Jesus and enter into his rest.